Turn Tradition Upside Down: How To Throw A Memorable Mixed-Gendered Wedding
Tradition can be a wonderful thing. But sometimes, you need to buck the trend and do something a little differently. Sometimes, a groom might want his sister to stand up next to him at the altar while he waits for his partner to come down the aisle. Perhaps the bride’s best friend is a man and he is the person she wants as her “mate” of honor. There’s no law that says you have to only have women standing with the bride and men supporting the groom!
Along with destination weddings, mixed-gender wedding parties are becoming quite the norm these days. Also, it’s not just for gay or queer couples. Heterosexual couples are doing it all the time too. It’s your special day and the people who mean the most to you in the world should stand up there next to you.
So, let’s look at how to host a mixed-gender destination wedding in style:
Think About What To Name Your Group
Traditional labels like “bridesmaid” and “groomsmen” are not going to really work when you have mixed-gender wedding parties. To include everyone, it’s good to come up with a name that suits your group. Instead of talking about the bridal party, you could simply call them your wedding party. If you want to be a bit more out there, use a name like your I Do Crew.
Throw Out The Traditional Gender Roles For Weddings
There’s a lot in a wedding based on tradition, including who is supposed to do what on the day. You can ignore the traditional gender roles if you are changing it up with your wedding party. If there are men standing for the bride and they want to carry bouquets or act as flower girls, why shouldn’t they? If you have a best lady for the groom, she should definitely give a toast at the reception.
Assign roles to your wedding party based on what the people are good at and what they want to do for you. This will put a lot less stress on you too because you know you can rely on people to look out for you and fulfil their roles on and before the day.
Don’t Worry About Gender Pairings
Traditionally, couples will try to get the same number of men and women in their parties so that they can pair up for the walk down the aisle and other elements of the wedding. If you’re mixing it up with genders in your party, then don’t worry about having traditional pairings.
There’s no reason two men or two women can’t walk down the aisle together. Alternatively, you could have people in groups of three or more if that suits your friends and family better. Do whatever feels natural for your wedding and the people taking part in it.
Don’t Limit Your Bachelor Or Bachelorette Parties To One Gender
One way to avoid having people feel excluded or left out is to just throw one party or event rather than two separate ones. Of course, this isn’t always what you want. It can be fun to let off some steam away from your spouse-to-be before the wedding.
If you’re going to do separate parties, just do something that won’t make people feel like they don’t belong.
As a bride, if you want a mate of honor but he doesn’t want to go to feminine events like getting your nails done for a bachelorette, think of a party or function where he and you will have fun.
Talk To Your Party About What They Want To Wear
This is something you should do regardless of the genders that make up your wedding party. It’s never nice to force people to wear an outfit that they don’t feel comfortable in. Especially because your wedding day is really important to these people who love and support you too.
For mixed-gender wedding parties, you need to think a little outside the box to make it feel completely natural. A great way to do it is to have one color or style for the bride’s party and another one for the groom’s. Just make sure they work within the overall tone of the wedding and complement one another. For example, the bride’s party could be in the same shades as the flowers in the bridal bouquet and the groom’s party could be in darker colors or neutrals to complement the theme.
Another option is to mix up who wears dresses and who wears suits. You could have the groom’s party in suits and the bride’s party in dresses, although this might be a bit daring for some men to go for. Again, think about who makes up your bridal party and what they’ll be comfortable in.
Think Same Theme Rather Than Same Item For Gifts
It’s traditional to give gifts to the members of your wedding party and that’s one really thoughtful tradition that shouldn’t get thrown out. The usual way of doing it is to get the same gift for the groomsmen and the same gift for the bridesmaids. If you’re mixing up the genders, then this may not be appropriate.
Instead of getting the exact same gift as you’d do with your wedding favors, rather think about a theme or what you want the gifts to say. Then you can pick a gift that suit the person you’re giving it to based around that theme. It’ll have a wonderful personal touch and still be something that is similar to what you’re getting the other members of your party.
Do Your Wedding Your Way
No matter where in the world you get married, it’s important to remember that traditions are not rules. Just because people have done weddings one way for hundreds of years doesn’t mean you have to stick to the same way of doing it for your special day. It’s your day and should be celebrated in a way that means something to you, with the people you love the most. No matter what gender they are!
Further Reading:
Our Top 10 Steps for Planning a Successful Destination Wedding
Take a Look at our Digital Planning Tool Kit
Learn More About How Much a Wedding Abroad May Cost